Short Stories: #1 Gone Girl

Image result for gone girlOctober 2014

She was sweet, intelligent and different, nowhere close to ordinary. How could he have said no for a movie? So, they took a cab to PVR Plaza, CP where he had booked corner seats, obviously, without keeping her in the know.

She whispered in his ear that her friends see stark similarities between her and the protagonist’s wife (Amy), and that he should be worried. He couldn’t help but ignore and laugh, because she was too sweet and nice to act like Amy (who showed symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder)

They kissed before the movie ended.

October 2015

He couldn’t ever fully understand her emotions and she was fed up of his expectations. Together, they decided to quit the relationship.

February 2016

He was diagnosed with three emotional stress related health problems. The first, took away a few of his hearing frequencies, the second his digestive system and the third his sense of personal identity.

He realized that her friends weren’t entirely wrong. Outcomes matched! She was the gone girl!

 

 

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Dating a Mallu chic for Dummies

My life has been enlightened since I met this beautiful Mallu chic, however this does not come without its own set of pitfalls. Read on to find out what they are:

Disclaimer: All the views expressed below are derived from my own experience. Try them at home at your own expense.

  1. She is a confused Indian: Is she from a forbidden country in the Middle East? Does she have a fancy accent? Does she think too high of herself? Am I confusing you? Ok. Have you ever heard her make the following remark:
    ‘McDonald’s!, who eats at McDonald’s?’
    Well, now you know you’re in big trouble.
  2. The great wall of language barriers: If your chic does not speak Hindi and you are a north Indian guy like me you have three options:
    a. You take a course on sign language
    b. You learn Malayalam
    c. You pretend to be dumb (which kind of compliments the sign language point 😉 )
  3. Turmoil of the cuisines: Food for her is sometimes just a cup of coffee or a bag of chips. Yeah that chapati and dal which was always a complete meal for you would now be a distant dream 😉
    Also, be prepared for rice, a lot of rice.
  4.  What is love? If she happens to compete with you in every single hobby of your and beats the shit out of you then just admit that your game is over. You definitely need to go try your luck on someone else now! And BTW love = competition for her 😉

Hope that you now know what things you need to take care of in case you want to date a Mallu chic. All the best!

Credits: beingmantastic.wordpress.com

 

 

 

Sculpting 101

Recently I tried my hands on sculpting. This is what came out.

It was so much fun sculpting for the first time. All you need is some clay and modelling tools (those small sticks in yellow). BTW I could cot complete the head ‘coz I fell short of clay. Check out this space for more creative stuff 😀

And yeah, if you’re planning to try your hands on sculpting here’s the best video I found. Enjoy!

12 things to do when you’re bored in class

Awesome stuff I can only dream of writing 😉

beingmantastic

Disclaimer: Most of these have been tried and tested and are proven to entertain both you and your classmates.

  1. Choose a victim and stare him down
  2. Play rock-paper-scissors with yourself
  3. Make up your own language
  4. Learn origami
  5. Make hearts out of paper clips and throw them at random guys
  6. Raise your hand and say ‘May the force be with you’
  7. Take a power nap under your desk
  8. If the professor asks you a question, look deep into his eyes and  answer in a whisper
  9. Rate your classmates on a scale of 1-5 and slip the paper into your benchmate’s desk
  10. Stare at the ceiling, if someone asks why reply that you’re trying to communicate with your planet
  11. Try to learn how to really play Minesweeper
  12. Doodle on yourself, pretend you lost your memory and walk out of class

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My (early) morning routine

Funny.. check this out!

beingmantastic

4:00 AM: I’m driving around in my Hummer H2, with the wind in my hair, wearin’ sexy glares, givin’ the boys the stares. ‘Cos that’s how I roll, baeby!

4:15 AM: Need to get up. Need to finish presentation. Need to look nice to make presentation.

4.20 AM: Drool

4: 30 AM: Why did Zayn leave One Direction? It’s been long since I read about Kejriwal. Why aren’t all bras called push-up bras? Are they not special enough?

4:40 AM: If I wake up now, I could go for an early morning jog. Wonder how many laps will get me Beyonce’s toned legs.. I wonder if Beyonce’s daughter got her pretty genes.

*Google: Beyonce- daughter*

*Google: Aishwarya Rai- daughter*

*Google: does Rihanna have a daughter*

*Google: Tips for a productive morning*

7:00 AM: I hate being an adult. I don’t want to adult. I dont know how to adult!

*Google: Fountain of youth-fact or fiction*

8:00…

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